horoscope:
[June 28, 2005
In your attempts to always be ''Ms. Nice Gal,'' peijun, you might find that you are compromising some of your own inner values. Know that balance and harmony is a wonderful thing, but it is not always worth the price of self-sacrifice. Don't become someone you aren't just so you can maintain the peace. Your powers of tolerance are apt to be tested today. Don't feel bad if you suddenly feel the urge to fight. Go with it.]
lolx.... hahahahahahaha...
counting down to payday..
===================================================
我们用尽一生追求物质享受. 但到达人生某个阶段, 我们往往发现, 最珍惜的也许是无法上标上价钱的琐碎事物. 像最初的交谈, 最后的拥抱, 最坚定的眼神, 最灿烂的微笑... 最美好的回忆..
最近读了两本张小娴的书.. 那时候的我才发现, 世上没有永远. 一般来说, 当一个人用"永远" 两个字,想表的是在那一刻, 煞那就是永恒...
==================================================
生活没什么大变化. 也许是我适应能力强.. 又或许自己是处于一个极度缺乏感觉的精神内.. haizz
Monday, June 27
Monday, June 20
after june 18
Yesterday was good, today even better.
Forgotten alot abt ytd, juz remembered that i woke up feeling terrible..
Went back to sch for the ceremony, den my parents brought me to plaza parkroyal for buffet lunch.. v^.^
Saw a couple of my cousemates: huiping, eileen, huihui, patrick, trevor, qiuqun, evangeline, jasmine etc... and 2 of my sec sch mates like leesiah and joanne.. Almost fell asleep before the whole thing begins..
Totally didnt expect the marketing thing.. And i'm still wondering if i heard wrongly.. Izzit really marketing??!!! If it is, i'm extremely amazed. Marketing is one of the least subject i enjoyed. I could have sworn i fell asleep in EVERY SINGLE lecture and tutorial. Except once when i was chatting with eve over sth real amusing..
Seriously speaking, i loathe the projects. I hate the 4 Ps. So i have absolutely no idea why it's that subject and none other. And Mr Ram would know how sleepy a student i were coz he always caught me sleeping during his lessons, juz tt he's way too kind to embarrass me.
To think that i'm quite well-known for sleeping during lectures AND tutorials coz i have pple coming up to me and ask how i'm able to sleep thru the whole semester.. -_-"' How i know? It's a habit... Maybe tt's why they're shocked. i am too..
Went back to meritus for a trainees' meeting.. Waste my time.
Thought abt alot of things on my way home...
----------------------------------------------------------
Thought back abt how determined i was to choose the polytechnic route since day 1 in secondary school. The decision never waivers.
Thought abt how many of my wants becomes my needs hence they were like dreams come true.
Ms Teoh said "look for new beginnings when u reach dead end." This i think i have a lot to learn.
[There's a million things i feel like doing today, like cry]
Humans are humble by nature, that i believe. So ytd i allowed myself to feel proud, abt myself. Juz like i let my humble nature rest on the day i receivd my Os results, the day i received the best cadet award, the day i stood on stage for pistol, the day i was elected captain, the day i got my trophies and medals, the days i stopped arguments and quarrels, the days... Good, bad and ugly.. Days i cant seemed to forget.
Thru the years, i've steadily conqured hills then mountains.. Sometimes, i find that God is unfair. He's too good to me. I find Angels and Him giving me stronger wings to fly higher. Yet i realised maybe all they did was to cheer me on (i know who they are).. I made MYSELf stronger by exercising my muscles, spreading my wings and fly. It's sth like when u tasted heaven, u wont want to be down in the dumps, ever.
I was in the lousiest EM2 cls in Primary sch and being sort of looked down then and by the high and mighty counselors clique in secondary school. Maybe tt's why i dun want to be there again. Secondary 2 was THE year.. Pple recognised me for my consistent good results, sports excellence, CCAs achievements, equally talented bro and extremely popular friends.. And i'm a greedy person. I want to keep all that. Keep them forever, even if they're worth nothing- the titles, the wow~ factor.. Coz they made me who i am today..
In one of my very very old entries, i mentioned abt riding on pple's luck and fame. I'm still doing that. Maybe we all do. Some pple juz bring luck to u, it's as simple as ABC.
[Once in awhile, we need to let our wings rest and soar. Hence we ride on winds and glide.]
It's the same for me.
------------------------------------------------------------
Work was fantastic today. besides having a great treat at the lounge, i worked extra 1.5 hrs without OT pay, juz sitting there and chatting with them..
And i find that steph and i am the best partner. Everytime i work with her, i sure get tips.. haha.. Though it's nt alot.. Didnt realise till she told me abt it.. lolx.. So i really hope i get more chance to work wif her in the future.. :P
And today, i stood at the lounge watching this interview with MM Lee.. Was so inspirational that i was rendered speechless.. lolx..
he mentioned sth tt reminds me of life...
"we can only play with the cards that we have in our hands"
so i think: isnt tt a splendid example of luck?
isnt tt what we call destiny? aint tt adaptation?
so am i wrong when i say i think success is 95% luck and 5% hardwork?
he said sth like he is lucky to have Singapore. imagine being born in Africa. what can he do? that's the same case for many of us.. if u're born with a silver spoon in ur mouth, u can talk abt being entrepreneurial and starting a new business. if u're born having to worry abt ur next meal, would u still think of having a new concept restarant in paragon? or designing clothes for fashion shows? or even winning the lottery?
=====================================
END OF STORY.
=====================================
Forgotten alot abt ytd, juz remembered that i woke up feeling terrible..
Went back to sch for the ceremony, den my parents brought me to plaza parkroyal for buffet lunch.. v^.^
Saw a couple of my cousemates: huiping, eileen, huihui, patrick, trevor, qiuqun, evangeline, jasmine etc... and 2 of my sec sch mates like leesiah and joanne.. Almost fell asleep before the whole thing begins..
Totally didnt expect the marketing thing.. And i'm still wondering if i heard wrongly.. Izzit really marketing??!!! If it is, i'm extremely amazed. Marketing is one of the least subject i enjoyed. I could have sworn i fell asleep in EVERY SINGLE lecture and tutorial. Except once when i was chatting with eve over sth real amusing..
Seriously speaking, i loathe the projects. I hate the 4 Ps. So i have absolutely no idea why it's that subject and none other. And Mr Ram would know how sleepy a student i were coz he always caught me sleeping during his lessons, juz tt he's way too kind to embarrass me.
To think that i'm quite well-known for sleeping during lectures AND tutorials coz i have pple coming up to me and ask how i'm able to sleep thru the whole semester.. -_-"' How i know? It's a habit... Maybe tt's why they're shocked. i am too..
Went back to meritus for a trainees' meeting.. Waste my time.
Thought abt alot of things on my way home...
----------------------------------------------------------
Thought back abt how determined i was to choose the polytechnic route since day 1 in secondary school. The decision never waivers.
Thought abt how many of my wants becomes my needs hence they were like dreams come true.
Ms Teoh said "look for new beginnings when u reach dead end." This i think i have a lot to learn.
[There's a million things i feel like doing today, like cry]
Humans are humble by nature, that i believe. So ytd i allowed myself to feel proud, abt myself. Juz like i let my humble nature rest on the day i receivd my Os results, the day i received the best cadet award, the day i stood on stage for pistol, the day i was elected captain, the day i got my trophies and medals, the days i stopped arguments and quarrels, the days... Good, bad and ugly.. Days i cant seemed to forget.
Thru the years, i've steadily conqured hills then mountains.. Sometimes, i find that God is unfair. He's too good to me. I find Angels and Him giving me stronger wings to fly higher. Yet i realised maybe all they did was to cheer me on (i know who they are).. I made MYSELf stronger by exercising my muscles, spreading my wings and fly. It's sth like when u tasted heaven, u wont want to be down in the dumps, ever.
I was in the lousiest EM2 cls in Primary sch and being sort of looked down then and by the high and mighty counselors clique in secondary school. Maybe tt's why i dun want to be there again. Secondary 2 was THE year.. Pple recognised me for my consistent good results, sports excellence, CCAs achievements, equally talented bro and extremely popular friends.. And i'm a greedy person. I want to keep all that. Keep them forever, even if they're worth nothing- the titles, the wow~ factor.. Coz they made me who i am today..
In one of my very very old entries, i mentioned abt riding on pple's luck and fame. I'm still doing that. Maybe we all do. Some pple juz bring luck to u, it's as simple as ABC.
[Once in awhile, we need to let our wings rest and soar. Hence we ride on winds and glide.]
It's the same for me.
------------------------------------------------------------
Work was fantastic today. besides having a great treat at the lounge, i worked extra 1.5 hrs without OT pay, juz sitting there and chatting with them..
And i find that steph and i am the best partner. Everytime i work with her, i sure get tips.. haha.. Though it's nt alot.. Didnt realise till she told me abt it.. lolx.. So i really hope i get more chance to work wif her in the future.. :P
And today, i stood at the lounge watching this interview with MM Lee.. Was so inspirational that i was rendered speechless.. lolx..
he mentioned sth tt reminds me of life...
"we can only play with the cards that we have in our hands"
so i think: isnt tt a splendid example of luck?
isnt tt what we call destiny? aint tt adaptation?
so am i wrong when i say i think success is 95% luck and 5% hardwork?
he said sth like he is lucky to have Singapore. imagine being born in Africa. what can he do? that's the same case for many of us.. if u're born with a silver spoon in ur mouth, u can talk abt being entrepreneurial and starting a new business. if u're born having to worry abt ur next meal, would u still think of having a new concept restarant in paragon? or designing clothes for fashion shows? or even winning the lottery?
=====================================
END OF STORY.
=====================================
Saturday, June 18
this is what i love about the reception area.. the mirrors!! it's tinted.. lolx.. take a close look at the "vase" of "plant" at the extreme left.. it's what the DESIGNER came up with.. anyway, the pink and white vase and the round plate on the right is also by the same designer.. wonder why the decor is so diff.. 
Friday, June 17
many things in life are fated
i seriousy think that electronic devices and i cant get along well. in fact, we cant even co-exist.
the keycard laptop is down, the fax machine got prob, i kept forgetting to charge my hp, the plasma tv in the lounge cant change channel coz the control is missing, and the com at home hates me.. everyone else in my family seems to be able to operate the com but not me. there is a time limit of abt 10 mins b4 the com "hangs itself" and usually it happens when i'm the one using.. so i cant check mail and cant blog for days.. but that's as well.. work is taking up too much of my time.
btw, i lost the anklet char and jas gave to me last yr.. wore it to work and took it off.. i cant find it in my bag nor the locker so it's sayonara i guess.. too bad..
called jas to ask for my blazer back coz my cousin wants to borrow from me. i "politely and conveniently asked" her abt the money she owed me. and was kinda pissed with her reply..
i dun like money talk coz it strains the frenship (provided if there is any left) and it's quite an awkward topic to end with.. she told me she can return me the blazer and shoes the following night coz she can go over to timo's house to collect but the money she got to contact her friend to get the money to return me!!! like wth lor.. freaking irritating.. it's already quite embarrassing for a friend to remind u that u have outstanding loans to be paid ASAP.. that shows how forgetful and irresponsible u are.. plus the "ask frm fren to return me my money so i can return u" part makes me wonder if she even have a "little" savings.. and if she's really broke, cant she borrow from her mom first? i really have NO idea.. she insisted that she return me the blazer and shoes FIRST, den talk abt money later.. but i aint gonna do that.. coz i got a VERY strong feeling that later means never.. so i told her to return me ALL 3 items TOGETHER, the blazer, shoes and money.. but she was reluctant.. by then i was freaking irritated.. i told her to contact her fren, and get back to me latest by friday and i wanna hear from her by then. loathe it when pple do the damn disappearing act on me time and again, den give a whole load of excuses and crap. and i'm nt sorry to bring up past incidents while dealing with the present situation. watever it is, i'll get EVERYTHING from her by next week. case closed.
met shini at the train station on my way home today. it's already abt 12 midnight when we reached Hougang.. the 1st thing she said when she saw me was to comment that i look fairer.. of course i am, 2 months without vitamin D takes a whole lot of pigment off my skin..
right now, i juz want to get those damn mgtmnt faces out of my mind.. they're somehow haunting me coz i kept thinking how much i dislike them and why they're not among the 200 to go.. and i see them everyday, coz when they hav nth to do, they come to the new lounge. when they hav things to do, they come to the lounge too.. and when they're there, they make life difficult for all of us. they pinpoint things that are not soothing to THEIR eyes, they give sugegstions that we ALREADY THOUGHT OF, and make remarks that we have NO CONTROL over.. i think most of them sort of hate me but i dun blame them. i dun like ALL of them either..
and i got a feeling i'm going to get diabetes at the rate i'm eating mentoes.. and i got to go back for a trainees' meeting with the front office manager on my off day!
and i'm so fortunate the management works during office hours.. this is the first time i'm SO grateful to be in the afternoon shift!! talking abt this, it's the 1st time in a month that i'm working afternoon shift!!! say goodbye to the rush hour..
the keycard laptop is down, the fax machine got prob, i kept forgetting to charge my hp, the plasma tv in the lounge cant change channel coz the control is missing, and the com at home hates me.. everyone else in my family seems to be able to operate the com but not me. there is a time limit of abt 10 mins b4 the com "hangs itself" and usually it happens when i'm the one using.. so i cant check mail and cant blog for days.. but that's as well.. work is taking up too much of my time.
btw, i lost the anklet char and jas gave to me last yr.. wore it to work and took it off.. i cant find it in my bag nor the locker so it's sayonara i guess.. too bad..
called jas to ask for my blazer back coz my cousin wants to borrow from me. i "politely and conveniently asked" her abt the money she owed me. and was kinda pissed with her reply..
i dun like money talk coz it strains the frenship (provided if there is any left) and it's quite an awkward topic to end with.. she told me she can return me the blazer and shoes the following night coz she can go over to timo's house to collect but the money she got to contact her friend to get the money to return me!!! like wth lor.. freaking irritating.. it's already quite embarrassing for a friend to remind u that u have outstanding loans to be paid ASAP.. that shows how forgetful and irresponsible u are.. plus the "ask frm fren to return me my money so i can return u" part makes me wonder if she even have a "little" savings.. and if she's really broke, cant she borrow from her mom first? i really have NO idea.. she insisted that she return me the blazer and shoes FIRST, den talk abt money later.. but i aint gonna do that.. coz i got a VERY strong feeling that later means never.. so i told her to return me ALL 3 items TOGETHER, the blazer, shoes and money.. but she was reluctant.. by then i was freaking irritated.. i told her to contact her fren, and get back to me latest by friday and i wanna hear from her by then. loathe it when pple do the damn disappearing act on me time and again, den give a whole load of excuses and crap. and i'm nt sorry to bring up past incidents while dealing with the present situation. watever it is, i'll get EVERYTHING from her by next week. case closed.
met shini at the train station on my way home today. it's already abt 12 midnight when we reached Hougang.. the 1st thing she said when she saw me was to comment that i look fairer.. of course i am, 2 months without vitamin D takes a whole lot of pigment off my skin..
right now, i juz want to get those damn mgtmnt faces out of my mind.. they're somehow haunting me coz i kept thinking how much i dislike them and why they're not among the 200 to go.. and i see them everyday, coz when they hav nth to do, they come to the new lounge. when they hav things to do, they come to the lounge too.. and when they're there, they make life difficult for all of us. they pinpoint things that are not soothing to THEIR eyes, they give sugegstions that we ALREADY THOUGHT OF, and make remarks that we have NO CONTROL over.. i think most of them sort of hate me but i dun blame them. i dun like ALL of them either..
and i got a feeling i'm going to get diabetes at the rate i'm eating mentoes.. and i got to go back for a trainees' meeting with the front office manager on my off day!
and i'm so fortunate the management works during office hours.. this is the first time i'm SO grateful to be in the afternoon shift!! talking abt this, it's the 1st time in a month that i'm working afternoon shift!!! say goodbye to the rush hour..
Monday, June 6
anything u resist, persist
came across this before and thot it makes no sense [anything u resist, persist] . now it does.
has been 2 weeks after concierge and more than one and a half months into SIP. had some really enjoyable times, some not-so-terrible occurances and i get along with the pple well... overall, it's okay but somehow, something is not right.
was thinking if i didnt pay as much attention to that inner voice, or i'm juz doing another of that closing-in acts.. came to a conclusion that it's all becoz of insufficient rest and repressed impulses.. so i did some changes to my life.. spent money without feeling anything. i carry the words of "heartache" on my mouth yet i cant feel any pain. i thought the more i spend, the more guilty i'll feel. but i was wrong. usually when i go on a shopping spree, i'll unpack all the things and tk a look at everything again. this time, i juz chuck them in the cupboard. things dont seem to matter.
slept for close to 14 hours. wake up feeling normal. went shopping with my mom at chinatown and walked to SGH to visit my grandpa. since that day i've been trying to remember his age but i couldnt recall. is it 80? 82 or 85... making trips to the hospital makes me feel sick. mom met her cousin there. her cousin's husband dying of cancer. last stage. incurable..
to me, it's nth. pple come, and go. it's juz a matter of time. and the strange feeling is still there. the methods i tried didnt help.
we put them on. it doesnt help us to be a better person. only more self-centered. sometimes, we must have less in order to be more.
has been 2 weeks after concierge and more than one and a half months into SIP. had some really enjoyable times, some not-so-terrible occurances and i get along with the pple well... overall, it's okay but somehow, something is not right.
was thinking if i didnt pay as much attention to that inner voice, or i'm juz doing another of that closing-in acts.. came to a conclusion that it's all becoz of insufficient rest and repressed impulses.. so i did some changes to my life.. spent money without feeling anything. i carry the words of "heartache" on my mouth yet i cant feel any pain. i thought the more i spend, the more guilty i'll feel. but i was wrong. usually when i go on a shopping spree, i'll unpack all the things and tk a look at everything again. this time, i juz chuck them in the cupboard. things dont seem to matter.
slept for close to 14 hours. wake up feeling normal. went shopping with my mom at chinatown and walked to SGH to visit my grandpa. since that day i've been trying to remember his age but i couldnt recall. is it 80? 82 or 85... making trips to the hospital makes me feel sick. mom met her cousin there. her cousin's husband dying of cancer. last stage. incurable..
to me, it's nth. pple come, and go. it's juz a matter of time. and the strange feeling is still there. the methods i tried didnt help.
we put them on. it doesnt help us to be a better person. only more self-centered. sometimes, we must have less in order to be more.
Sunday, May 29
watched infernal affairs juz now... remembered i posted an entry about that last time.. so i retrieved it..
[ In the end, both the good and the bad died. they ended up killing each other.
fate makes it such that their lives are inter-linked.
pple who want to be good. they sacrifice to be bad so that they can be good.
black and white. scheming against one another. dont they know that there are grey areas? ]
till now, i still agree. i love the story line. i like tony leung even more.. the characters suit the actors so well that it is as though the scriptwriter customed a movie specially for them. and i cannot think of 2 other actors more suitable to act the younger version of andy and tony.. shawn yu and edison chen.. together, they make the transition between old and young so seamless.. and since that time i watched the show, i am in love with that cai qin's song..
good and bad. isnt it all on the surface? we see only the surface. and i wonder how sammi actually felt when she knew the truth about andy.. only he himself knows..
andy talks about choices.. zeng zhiwei said "you all are allowed to choose. choose the life you all want." he followed. so is he good or bad when he worked for him for close to 10 years but killed his "boss" with his own hands in the end?
or maybe he's scared. when we're afraid, we do things that we dun think we will under normal circumstances.. and when we lie, maybe we're saying the truth.
and i still think infernal affairs is so much better than dou yu (part 1)..
tml is the start of a new department.
gdluck to myself.
[ In the end, both the good and the bad died. they ended up killing each other.
fate makes it such that their lives are inter-linked.
pple who want to be good. they sacrifice to be bad so that they can be good.
black and white. scheming against one another. dont they know that there are grey areas? ]
till now, i still agree. i love the story line. i like tony leung even more.. the characters suit the actors so well that it is as though the scriptwriter customed a movie specially for them. and i cannot think of 2 other actors more suitable to act the younger version of andy and tony.. shawn yu and edison chen.. together, they make the transition between old and young so seamless.. and since that time i watched the show, i am in love with that cai qin's song..
good and bad. isnt it all on the surface? we see only the surface. and i wonder how sammi actually felt when she knew the truth about andy.. only he himself knows..
andy talks about choices.. zeng zhiwei said "you all are allowed to choose. choose the life you all want." he followed. so is he good or bad when he worked for him for close to 10 years but killed his "boss" with his own hands in the end?
or maybe he's scared. when we're afraid, we do things that we dun think we will under normal circumstances.. and when we lie, maybe we're saying the truth.
and i still think infernal affairs is so much better than dou yu (part 1)..
tml is the start of a new department.
gdluck to myself.
hate it coz it's part of me
it was my bro's birthday. on the 28th may. 3 years ago, on the exact same date, i sat for the O level chinese papers. 3 years later, i'm witnessing my siblings studying for the chinese paper on monday. kiss goodbye to memories..
logged on to friendster just now. realised a lot of changes. maybe i've drifted from the world. from my world. or maybe from the world of my friends.
i've learnt that apologising does no help, and what is done is done.
i cant say sorry to those people whom i HAVE NOT been in contact for donkey years.. i cant seem to find a valid reason to attach to this bo-xim-ness personality of mine. or rather, a valid excuse. if i cant even convince myself, what good can it do for others..
to elaborate on that, i've decided to bring in a very appropriate example: my old pal jas.
there's this saying " You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself." this applies. maybe not hate but rather, intense dislike.
i've been bearing this "grudge", sometimes even to the extent of putting the extire blame on her for not keeping in touch after so long, for always disappointing me during the outings with either ching or char and spoiler by bringing tempura maki along, plus forever ditching us if she got other plans.. used to dislike it so much i can feel my blood boil.
and silly me realised, today, that actually i hate that aspect of her becoz i see it in me. take away the tempura maki part and it's me over again.
some friends are no longer in contact bcoz i haven put in any effort to maintain the friendship. on my part, i did nothing except putting blame on others like decorating the xmas tree. i know it's a super bad habit of mine to juz take a sit back and relax attitude and wait for all good things to drop from the sky, to wait for all nice people to take the initiative when i could have easily done that myself. i never. i think i am able to live my life that way forever, waiting only for friends who think i am worthy of their friendship to keep in touch. but i was wrong. i CAN live my life THAT way, but do i? am i willing to do so?
now, i face a mega challenge. sch started last week and most of my friends are on SIP. maintaining a friendship needs constant effort on the part of both parties. do i have the energy to sustain that vast amt of effort that is needed, desperately? am i able to even complete my SIP AND meet up with friends on a consistent basis? the only thought i have when my off day is near is to juz have a good rest so i'm all ready to go again the next working day. i try not to be tired coz that's when the mood swing periods hit. and if i'm nt in tip-top condition, how am i able to live my life?
back to the topic. there are times where i live my day without thinking or feeling the need to contact pals.. often, it's because 5 years ago seemed like last week and yesterday seemed like 5 years ago.. i have a problem with time perception. some memories i hold dear, the time period that they are in seems nearer. memories that are vague, the time period seems so long ago..
i need constance reminder on keeping in touch. i dun think i need self help books. they dun really help.. i need to revamp my wardrobe together with my life.
i was PJ, now PK.
for friends who keep a lookout for new entries in my blog, thank you very much for updating urself with my life. (sounds like pj all over again.. -_-"') if i've nt been keeping in contact with u, pls yell at me the next time u have the chance to. THANKIE!!
Everything starts with yourself. with you making up ur mind abt what you're going to do with your life..
logged on to friendster just now. realised a lot of changes. maybe i've drifted from the world. from my world. or maybe from the world of my friends.
i've learnt that apologising does no help, and what is done is done.
i cant say sorry to those people whom i HAVE NOT been in contact for donkey years.. i cant seem to find a valid reason to attach to this bo-xim-ness personality of mine. or rather, a valid excuse. if i cant even convince myself, what good can it do for others..
to elaborate on that, i've decided to bring in a very appropriate example: my old pal jas.
there's this saying " You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself." this applies. maybe not hate but rather, intense dislike.
i've been bearing this "grudge", sometimes even to the extent of putting the extire blame on her for not keeping in touch after so long, for always disappointing me during the outings with either ching or char and spoiler by bringing tempura maki along, plus forever ditching us if she got other plans.. used to dislike it so much i can feel my blood boil.
and silly me realised, today, that actually i hate that aspect of her becoz i see it in me. take away the tempura maki part and it's me over again.
some friends are no longer in contact bcoz i haven put in any effort to maintain the friendship. on my part, i did nothing except putting blame on others like decorating the xmas tree. i know it's a super bad habit of mine to juz take a sit back and relax attitude and wait for all good things to drop from the sky, to wait for all nice people to take the initiative when i could have easily done that myself. i never. i think i am able to live my life that way forever, waiting only for friends who think i am worthy of their friendship to keep in touch. but i was wrong. i CAN live my life THAT way, but do i? am i willing to do so?
now, i face a mega challenge. sch started last week and most of my friends are on SIP. maintaining a friendship needs constant effort on the part of both parties. do i have the energy to sustain that vast amt of effort that is needed, desperately? am i able to even complete my SIP AND meet up with friends on a consistent basis? the only thought i have when my off day is near is to juz have a good rest so i'm all ready to go again the next working day. i try not to be tired coz that's when the mood swing periods hit. and if i'm nt in tip-top condition, how am i able to live my life?
back to the topic. there are times where i live my day without thinking or feeling the need to contact pals.. often, it's because 5 years ago seemed like last week and yesterday seemed like 5 years ago.. i have a problem with time perception. some memories i hold dear, the time period that they are in seems nearer. memories that are vague, the time period seems so long ago..
i need constance reminder on keeping in touch. i dun think i need self help books. they dun really help.. i need to revamp my wardrobe together with my life.
i was PJ, now PK.
for friends who keep a lookout for new entries in my blog, thank you very much for updating urself with my life. (sounds like pj all over again.. -_-"') if i've nt been keeping in contact with u, pls yell at me the next time u have the chance to. THANKIE!!
Everything starts with yourself. with you making up ur mind abt what you're going to do with your life..
Thursday, May 19
signed in to the counter thingy and found this person's (who came across my blog) blog. he said:
[ Due to (kinda) popular demand (okay, I'm lying), my checklist for the right girl:
1. Nice skin, long hair, pretty eyes.
2. Sociable and genuinely funny
3. Naturally kind to humans and animals
4. Loves children
5. Smart enough to see through my lies
6. Confident enough to love being in her own skin
7. Patient enough to understand my personality
8. She makes it remarkably difficult for me to win her affection
9. She makes me want to be a better person
Looking at the list, it's as though I want to be single all my life. ]
well, he can jolly well be. good luck to him and amen.
[ Due to (kinda) popular demand (okay, I'm lying), my checklist for the right girl:
1. Nice skin, long hair, pretty eyes.
2. Sociable and genuinely funny
3. Naturally kind to humans and animals
4. Loves children
5. Smart enough to see through my lies
6. Confident enough to love being in her own skin
7. Patient enough to understand my personality
8. She makes it remarkably difficult for me to win her affection
9. She makes me want to be a better person
Looking at the list, it's as though I want to be single all my life. ]
well, he can jolly well be. good luck to him and amen.
Sunday, May 8
sjab gathering.
i am grateful for this much awaited rest day and having a great time despite the meal that ripped twice across my heart.
as expected, the so-called SJAB gathering turned out to be the F4E1 outing. i "met up" with pple that i have the faintest idea about. besides having a 1 sentence conversation (if u call that a conversation) with a senior that i remember but dunno, i never even speak 1 word to any other except those handful from my batch.. kelly was late for 2 and a half hours!!(AS USUAL)
i do agree the whole ambience and decor is great, but the food is totally not to my liking. i am a junk food kinda person. i hate counting calories. the menu items are all printed with the amount of calories beside them. what a healthy lifestyle. and the vegetarian items on the belt are so much more than the NON-vegatarian items.. and i hate it so. even the sugar is the "healthier choice", calories and fat free.
i hate it so. we all do. we were complaining that we could have 2 meals of swensens with that amount of money we spent. or 2 days of kbox. and i have to work 2 days to cover up the cost.
they commented that we are as noisy as we were. and i'm glad about that. we gossip about the same pple that we did 7 years ago. we discussed the same topics as we did then. but it was still as fun.
with diff pple, we all behave differently. from the second we see each other, we never stop chatting. with some other friends, i can observe silence yet feel comfortable. with the 3 other loud kakis, all we do is talk. we never stop.
i'm NOT going to the next sjab outing. especially one that our dear mr WL organises. so far, he hasent hav any great ideas. and the reason why HE chose that restaurant is that his gf works there. the few of us got the feeling of being used. but well, forget it. this will be the first and the last time. plus the only memory i want to keep are those that doesnt involve them.
last but not least, happy bdae to our ah-meow. the oldest yet the youngest.
as expected, the so-called SJAB gathering turned out to be the F4E1 outing. i "met up" with pple that i have the faintest idea about. besides having a 1 sentence conversation (if u call that a conversation) with a senior that i remember but dunno, i never even speak 1 word to any other except those handful from my batch.. kelly was late for 2 and a half hours!!(AS USUAL)
i do agree the whole ambience and decor is great, but the food is totally not to my liking. i am a junk food kinda person. i hate counting calories. the menu items are all printed with the amount of calories beside them. what a healthy lifestyle. and the vegetarian items on the belt are so much more than the NON-vegatarian items.. and i hate it so. even the sugar is the "healthier choice", calories and fat free.
i hate it so. we all do. we were complaining that we could have 2 meals of swensens with that amount of money we spent. or 2 days of kbox. and i have to work 2 days to cover up the cost.
they commented that we are as noisy as we were. and i'm glad about that. we gossip about the same pple that we did 7 years ago. we discussed the same topics as we did then. but it was still as fun.
with diff pple, we all behave differently. from the second we see each other, we never stop chatting. with some other friends, i can observe silence yet feel comfortable. with the 3 other loud kakis, all we do is talk. we never stop.
i'm NOT going to the next sjab outing. especially one that our dear mr WL organises. so far, he hasent hav any great ideas. and the reason why HE chose that restaurant is that his gf works there. the few of us got the feeling of being used. but well, forget it. this will be the first and the last time. plus the only memory i want to keep are those that doesnt involve them.
last but not least, happy bdae to our ah-meow. the oldest yet the youngest.
Saturday, May 7
1 entry.
a million things happened. within a few days. felt as if the world is going the other way round and my mind is in a swirl.
first, the official start of my attachment.
second, dad going overseas.
third, the death of Dr Wee kim wee.
forth, the coming mother's day.
fifth, sjab gathering.
sixth, YP's bday.
seven, my grandma's death anniversary.
eight, feeling unwell.
5 days the nation spent, saying goodbye to the pple's president of s'pore. 2 days later, we'll be celebrating the much awaited day for mothers. this is the best example that life can be. showing that no matter what happens, life has to go on. regardless of the grief, the pain, the sorrow and the misery, time stop for noone. even a much loved, much respected man.
his death brought about memories. memories of my grandma's death on mother's day on my first high school year. memories of her not able to see the millennium. memories of how much she resembles the late Dr Wee. loved and respected, kind and caring, patient and generous... feelings that u know are like ripping a wound before it heals. stories like this, will never be a legend.. at least to me.
was reading the papers and wondering. why am i not able to meet this wonderful man in the past? frankly speaking, i have the vaguest memory of him. i barely remembering him being a president, doing what the papers claimed that he did. but i just believe. that what they said is true. many head of states are being respected. but not many are loved by the people. that's true. so true. to touch the life of one is difficult enough. to touch the lives of thousands and thousands. it's barely possible. but he showed, that miracles happen.
and where can you find someone who can send you 600 letters in ur lifetime? who is able to rank and remember ur 10 favourite songs? someone who is able to sustain love for 69 years? in this lifetime, the pple of s'pore is fortunate. we witnessed magic. and fantasies that come true.
when i'm gone, if i'm able to touch the lives of 5 pple, i'm contented. if 10 strangers attend my wake, it's good enough. so i'm asking myself. is it only when you're gone for good, den pple start remembering all that you've done? start appreciating what you did, start acknowledging your contribution for their change for the better? and is that the only time when pple really forgive what they can never forget when u're still alive and kicking? is that really the time when grudges are gone with the wind like ash?
reading about great things by great man. what good can that be? it's like reading about how someone broke the world record in olympics. we cant fully understand what goes behind the scenes.. we see the glam and glory. only.
first, the official start of my attachment.
second, dad going overseas.
third, the death of Dr Wee kim wee.
forth, the coming mother's day.
fifth, sjab gathering.
sixth, YP's bday.
seven, my grandma's death anniversary.
eight, feeling unwell.
5 days the nation spent, saying goodbye to the pple's president of s'pore. 2 days later, we'll be celebrating the much awaited day for mothers. this is the best example that life can be. showing that no matter what happens, life has to go on. regardless of the grief, the pain, the sorrow and the misery, time stop for noone. even a much loved, much respected man.
his death brought about memories. memories of my grandma's death on mother's day on my first high school year. memories of her not able to see the millennium. memories of how much she resembles the late Dr Wee. loved and respected, kind and caring, patient and generous... feelings that u know are like ripping a wound before it heals. stories like this, will never be a legend.. at least to me.
was reading the papers and wondering. why am i not able to meet this wonderful man in the past? frankly speaking, i have the vaguest memory of him. i barely remembering him being a president, doing what the papers claimed that he did. but i just believe. that what they said is true. many head of states are being respected. but not many are loved by the people. that's true. so true. to touch the life of one is difficult enough. to touch the lives of thousands and thousands. it's barely possible. but he showed, that miracles happen.
and where can you find someone who can send you 600 letters in ur lifetime? who is able to rank and remember ur 10 favourite songs? someone who is able to sustain love for 69 years? in this lifetime, the pple of s'pore is fortunate. we witnessed magic. and fantasies that come true.
when i'm gone, if i'm able to touch the lives of 5 pple, i'm contented. if 10 strangers attend my wake, it's good enough. so i'm asking myself. is it only when you're gone for good, den pple start remembering all that you've done? start appreciating what you did, start acknowledging your contribution for their change for the better? and is that the only time when pple really forgive what they can never forget when u're still alive and kicking? is that really the time when grudges are gone with the wind like ash?
reading about great things by great man. what good can that be? it's like reading about how someone broke the world record in olympics. we cant fully understand what goes behind the scenes.. we see the glam and glory. only.
Sunday, May 1
只想给自己一个 Happy Day.
只想给自己一个 Happy Day.
and i did it!
went yum cha with eve, jo and tina. had such a fun time laughing and crapping and eating and ordering and gosipping and joking..
the queue was long but the place was surprisingly nice, despite it being in the middle of nowhere and above so many similar shops in chinatown.. i like the layout of the restaurant. it's not like xingfuyingcha whereby the whole place seemd "open."
the Chrysanthemum tea was nice and the bao (pi) was nice.. the dimsum was good. haha.. very long nv had such a fun time le. plus the table calling equipment was working great.
walked ard the small shops of chinatown. and wasnt i amazes to find so many fascinating stuff. things that u wont be able to find in paragon and heeren. not even in far east. lolx..
standing in the middle of chinatown while enjoying coconut water was a total different experience.. the juice taste juz great with the blazing sun.
walked ard the area (cant name the places) and had a shooping trip totally different from the usual walkwalk ard town. our last stop was at OG. called home and my dad fetched me home frm the train station. came home to find my mom cooking pepper crab!!! well, what a feast.
that's why i said i did it.
tml will be back to makeup, uniform, bun hair, stockings and court shoes. bleahz. =(
and i did it!
went yum cha with eve, jo and tina. had such a fun time laughing and crapping and eating and ordering and gosipping and joking..
the queue was long but the place was surprisingly nice, despite it being in the middle of nowhere and above so many similar shops in chinatown.. i like the layout of the restaurant. it's not like xingfuyingcha whereby the whole place seemd "open."
the Chrysanthemum tea was nice and the bao (pi) was nice.. the dimsum was good. haha.. very long nv had such a fun time le. plus the table calling equipment was working great.
walked ard the small shops of chinatown. and wasnt i amazes to find so many fascinating stuff. things that u wont be able to find in paragon and heeren. not even in far east. lolx..
standing in the middle of chinatown while enjoying coconut water was a total different experience.. the juice taste juz great with the blazing sun.
walked ard the area (cant name the places) and had a shooping trip totally different from the usual walkwalk ard town. our last stop was at OG. called home and my dad fetched me home frm the train station. came home to find my mom cooking pepper crab!!! well, what a feast.
that's why i said i did it.
tml will be back to makeup, uniform, bun hair, stockings and court shoes. bleahz. =(
Saturday, April 30
TGIF
i may seem stupid, but i'm not dumb since i'm nt the only one who felt that way.
i think by now, someone already got the hint from the chain reactions and is trying to avoid problems..
heard frm the rest of them that there's a warehouse sale going on near killiney road for loreal, maybelline and garnier products.. so cheap that they bought so many things.. and DKNY having sale. 80%!! that's what they said. i dunno abt it. too tired to go anyway.
i'm not in a mean mood today. that's why i nv do stupid things like calling them when they were playing the game of run and seek.
i've decided to blow my one first month allowance when i get it. minus my transport fee of course. arbo i'll be running deficit.
anyway, was calculating savings on my way home. i guess the scorching sun sort of burnt my brain.
scenario: i'll go out to work once i graduate. meaning, i'll complete my diploma before i even reach 20. that implies that at the tender age of 19.5, i'm out in the work force. taking a 15 years working period, if my average monthly salary is about $1200 (minus transport), i SHOULD BE able to save $500/mth.
here's the calculations:
$500/mth=$6000/yr
$6000/yr=$90,000 in 15 years time
ignoring interest and other investments (at age 35) if i'm lucky enuff, i'll be able to save $100,000...
that means, i cant even afford a 3-room resale flat!
i'm taking the assumption such that i want a one time payment. not monthly CPF deductions to pay by instalments. if by miracle this is possible, tell me where to get the money for renovations, furniture, electronic appliances, necessities and housewarming??!!!!!
if by miracle (again) all these are made possible one way or another, then i guess i SHOULD BE able to live comfortable when i reach 55, which is also the age where CPF comes into gd use. lets say i retire at age 63. the amount of money would be able to last me for another 10 years or so.
so juz a thought. if i spent all my money at age 70, can i request for an early death? i'll promise to make advanced guaranteed booking and apply for the relevant permits and visas...
i think by now, someone already got the hint from the chain reactions and is trying to avoid problems..
heard frm the rest of them that there's a warehouse sale going on near killiney road for loreal, maybelline and garnier products.. so cheap that they bought so many things.. and DKNY having sale. 80%!! that's what they said. i dunno abt it. too tired to go anyway.
i'm not in a mean mood today. that's why i nv do stupid things like calling them when they were playing the game of run and seek.
i've decided to blow my one first month allowance when i get it. minus my transport fee of course. arbo i'll be running deficit.
anyway, was calculating savings on my way home. i guess the scorching sun sort of burnt my brain.
scenario: i'll go out to work once i graduate. meaning, i'll complete my diploma before i even reach 20. that implies that at the tender age of 19.5, i'm out in the work force. taking a 15 years working period, if my average monthly salary is about $1200 (minus transport), i SHOULD BE able to save $500/mth.
here's the calculations:
$500/mth=$6000/yr
$6000/yr=$90,000 in 15 years time
ignoring interest and other investments (at age 35) if i'm lucky enuff, i'll be able to save $100,000...
that means, i cant even afford a 3-room resale flat!
i'm taking the assumption such that i want a one time payment. not monthly CPF deductions to pay by instalments. if by miracle this is possible, tell me where to get the money for renovations, furniture, electronic appliances, necessities and housewarming??!!!!!
if by miracle (again) all these are made possible one way or another, then i guess i SHOULD BE able to live comfortable when i reach 55, which is also the age where CPF comes into gd use. lets say i retire at age 63. the amount of money would be able to last me for another 10 years or so.
so juz a thought. if i spent all my money at age 70, can i request for an early death? i'll promise to make advanced guaranteed booking and apply for the relevant permits and visas...
Wednesday, April 27
classroom session for SIP scheduled at the clash timing that i dislike so much..
to make matters worse, i got the tutor that i always have communication breakdown with. how great. and the best thing? the ALO is someone that i dun even recall seeing. wish me luck pple.
saw the Lancome perfume that Viy was looking for that time. walked past and the colour caught my eyes. so hope viy could go back and take a look plus reconsider getting it. if i'm nt wrong, the smallest bottle is $58/=. haha
SJAB gathering coming up. next week. but i dun think i'm able to go. poor me. not being able to meet up with my clique is one thing. seeing the seniors and the rest of the loggerheads gang is another. poor me. not able to gossip, to share, and to slack.
to see the seniors, and proudly proclaim my "love" for the course.(*pui) elaborate on how VERY interesting the subjects are. how wonderful the SIP is and how the whole 2 years have been a fantastic experience for me. that is, just to make them jealous. they thought i'll go into biomed or some other bio-thingy related courses.. by then, i guess their "yaya" attitude shldnt be dominant. and may they regret how WELL we've been treated. i dun really dislike them. i'm juz not very fond of them. but maybe they're the same.
maybe the whole thing is coincidental. coz if i really meet up with them, i guess i'll either fall asleep when they're updating me about their lives, or discuss my life without letting them cut in. (not that i'm trying to be rude. if i sleep, it's either i'm too tired, or their conversation is way too boring. if i talk about myself, i'm just trying to open up and "blend in"..)
watever it is.
i tell u, a whole day without makeup is FANTATIC. MARVELOUS. GREAT!!!
okay. i need to save up 50 bucks. fast.
the DJs are talking about the population in China. by 2030, they will have about the size of a Singapore full of guys that are not able to have a partner. meaning, the ratio of guys compared to girls is way too different. inagine. a whole singapore full of guys!!!! that's pathetic. maybe they can consider taking vietnam wives...
but in recent years, more parents prefer baby girls compared to boys.. so maybe 60 years down the road, females are allowed to have two husbands or more. to make up for the ratio imbalance..
and by then, lesser or no female need to be missus anymore..
to make matters worse, i got the tutor that i always have communication breakdown with. how great. and the best thing? the ALO is someone that i dun even recall seeing. wish me luck pple.
saw the Lancome perfume that Viy was looking for that time. walked past and the colour caught my eyes. so hope viy could go back and take a look plus reconsider getting it. if i'm nt wrong, the smallest bottle is $58/=. haha
SJAB gathering coming up. next week. but i dun think i'm able to go. poor me. not being able to meet up with my clique is one thing. seeing the seniors and the rest of the loggerheads gang is another. poor me. not able to gossip, to share, and to slack.
to see the seniors, and proudly proclaim my "love" for the course.(*pui) elaborate on how VERY interesting the subjects are. how wonderful the SIP is and how the whole 2 years have been a fantastic experience for me. that is, just to make them jealous. they thought i'll go into biomed or some other bio-thingy related courses.. by then, i guess their "yaya" attitude shldnt be dominant. and may they regret how WELL we've been treated. i dun really dislike them. i'm juz not very fond of them. but maybe they're the same.
maybe the whole thing is coincidental. coz if i really meet up with them, i guess i'll either fall asleep when they're updating me about their lives, or discuss my life without letting them cut in. (not that i'm trying to be rude. if i sleep, it's either i'm too tired, or their conversation is way too boring. if i talk about myself, i'm just trying to open up and "blend in"..)
watever it is.
i tell u, a whole day without makeup is FANTATIC. MARVELOUS. GREAT!!!
okay. i need to save up 50 bucks. fast.
the DJs are talking about the population in China. by 2030, they will have about the size of a Singapore full of guys that are not able to have a partner. meaning, the ratio of guys compared to girls is way too different. inagine. a whole singapore full of guys!!!! that's pathetic. maybe they can consider taking vietnam wives...
but in recent years, more parents prefer baby girls compared to boys.. so maybe 60 years down the road, females are allowed to have two husbands or more. to make up for the ratio imbalance..
and by then, lesser or no female need to be missus anymore..
Tuesday, April 26
Day 6?
i can be so mean at times.. trice today.. keep track unintentionally..
confirmed my dislike (AGAIN) for that STY SLY since i happened to see him alight frm a cab.. suay cabbie uncle.. apologies to any of u who are great loyal fans of his. watever~
to tell the truth, his new CD rocks... i mean can be compared to rocks. (u know how impurities always sinks?) heard a few of the songs over the radio.. usually i dun hav extreme dislike for newcomers but his standard and quality of music is highly questionable... so i was wondering why in the world (s'pore to be specific) would someone even want to pre-order that CD with "ugly and low quality" packaging, as heard from a bunch of xiao meimeis outside midpoint orchard.. (those are exact words mind u)
and the Mac uni got me laughing hard. and the contagious laughter plus the "look" on their faces had me going again after i tried to surpress it..
now i know. i'm mean. and i mean really. coz i couldnt stop. gossiping is a great communication tool. maybe.
confirmed my dislike (AGAIN) for that STY SLY since i happened to see him alight frm a cab.. suay cabbie uncle.. apologies to any of u who are great loyal fans of his. watever~
to tell the truth, his new CD rocks... i mean can be compared to rocks. (u know how impurities always sinks?) heard a few of the songs over the radio.. usually i dun hav extreme dislike for newcomers but his standard and quality of music is highly questionable... so i was wondering why in the world (s'pore to be specific) would someone even want to pre-order that CD with "ugly and low quality" packaging, as heard from a bunch of xiao meimeis outside midpoint orchard.. (those are exact words mind u)
and the Mac uni got me laughing hard. and the contagious laughter plus the "look" on their faces had me going again after i tried to surpress it..
now i know. i'm mean. and i mean really. coz i couldnt stop. gossiping is a great communication tool. maybe.
Monday, April 25
The price to pay for being naive & gullible...
is high..
hasnt been doing much constructive stuff since i put one foot forward.
on second thoughts, at least i'm doing sth practical.
what i meant was that i am always doing the wrong things at the wrong time.
anyway, i'm trying very hard to be like the little blue bird that carries the whole sky on his back.
1 down. 3 more to go before i make up my mind and conclude. give me strength.
i want to get so many things as i walked ard town. but i cant.
AND THERE'S NO VIEW!! IF U CALL FACING THE WALL A VIEW. DAMN IT!!
okay. i hope someone can cure my lousy behaviour and pathetic attitude before next week..??
i guess not. bah.
hasnt been doing much constructive stuff since i put one foot forward.
on second thoughts, at least i'm doing sth practical.
what i meant was that i am always doing the wrong things at the wrong time.
anyway, i'm trying very hard to be like the little blue bird that carries the whole sky on his back.
1 down. 3 more to go before i make up my mind and conclude. give me strength.
i want to get so many things as i walked ard town. but i cant.
AND THERE'S NO VIEW!! IF U CALL FACING THE WALL A VIEW. DAMN IT!!
okay. i hope someone can cure my lousy behaviour and pathetic attitude before next week..??
i guess not. bah.
Sunday, April 24
What is the most-overlooked important detail that helps make a good relationship?
Intellectual compatibility.
Laughter.
Shopping and fashion sense.
Cuddling.
Honesty.
For those who has been constantly viewing my posts (therefore i assume u know me well enuff to answer this qn) u shld know what i'll choose, without a doubt.
WHAT ABOUT YOU??
yesterday night, my wisdom tooth gave me hell.
i guess the right tooth is out to take revenge after i extracted out the left tooth.
didnt want to let the tooth control my body so i didnt take the painkillers as advised by my mom.
went to bed after reading some comics so as to stop the pain from the uncomfortable swelling from disturbing my mind.
had a great rest frm last night. met kimpeng and eve in HM juz now.
life's slack. routine. easy.
i guess the right tooth is out to take revenge after i extracted out the left tooth.
didnt want to let the tooth control my body so i didnt take the painkillers as advised by my mom.
went to bed after reading some comics so as to stop the pain from the uncomfortable swelling from disturbing my mind.
had a great rest frm last night. met kimpeng and eve in HM juz now.
life's slack. routine. easy.
Sunday, April 17
~Tell and share~
That's why I started out blogging more than a year ago.
Here I am again, to make known how and what I think.
Read this fabulous article months ago. Enjoy:
THE MYTH OF FAME AND FORTUNE
Society's fascination with Hollywood and celebrities has just gone a little crazy. Millions idolize those who have achieved fame and fortune, but stardom does not provide the satisfaction that it advertises. Marilyn Monroe could have told us that.
Consider the celebrity of Muhammad Ali in his prime. He was known around the world as "the man who couldn't be beaten." His picture appeared on the cover of "Sports Illustrated" more times than any athlete in history. Whenever he went, the cameras followed. Today, though, it's a different story.
Sports writer Gary Smith recently spent some time with him at his home and asked to see his trophy room. Ali escorted him to a dark, damp barn beside his house. There, leaning against one wall, was a board filled with mementoes, photos from the "Thrilla in Manila," pictures of Ali dancing and punching and hoisting championship belts over his head. But the pictures were smeared with white streaks. Pigeons had made their home in the rafters.
Ali picked up the board and turned around, face to the wall. Then, as he started to leave, Smith heard him mumble, "I had the world and it wasn't nothing. Look now." Fame is fleeting. Fortune buys you nice things, but it doesn't make you happy.
The lesson here is timeless. Meaning will never be found in the praise and adoration of others. If that's where you're looking for it, you're destined for disappointment.
Here I am again, to make known how and what I think.
Read this fabulous article months ago. Enjoy:
THE MYTH OF FAME AND FORTUNE
Society's fascination with Hollywood and celebrities has just gone a little crazy. Millions idolize those who have achieved fame and fortune, but stardom does not provide the satisfaction that it advertises. Marilyn Monroe could have told us that.
Consider the celebrity of Muhammad Ali in his prime. He was known around the world as "the man who couldn't be beaten." His picture appeared on the cover of "Sports Illustrated" more times than any athlete in history. Whenever he went, the cameras followed. Today, though, it's a different story.
Sports writer Gary Smith recently spent some time with him at his home and asked to see his trophy room. Ali escorted him to a dark, damp barn beside his house. There, leaning against one wall, was a board filled with mementoes, photos from the "Thrilla in Manila," pictures of Ali dancing and punching and hoisting championship belts over his head. But the pictures were smeared with white streaks. Pigeons had made their home in the rafters.
Ali picked up the board and turned around, face to the wall. Then, as he started to leave, Smith heard him mumble, "I had the world and it wasn't nothing. Look now." Fame is fleeting. Fortune buys you nice things, but it doesn't make you happy.
The lesson here is timeless. Meaning will never be found in the praise and adoration of others. If that's where you're looking for it, you're destined for disappointment.
Tuesday, April 12
bloghopped during the study week and came across this.
[I strive for academic excellence,
Not because i like to win,
But because this society is superficial,
You arent getting nowhere if you dont have an outstanding cert.
I am a slave this way.
"Live fast, die young."
These are my words to live by.]
["The astrological symbol of Libra is the Scales. Like the scales of justice, Librans are objective and just. They abhor unfairness and conflict, striving above all for peace; but at times they are easily deterred from their beliefs. Librans are able to see all sides of an argument, but as their mental scales sway back and forth, they may never find balance."]
i stared at the screen and read it over and over again. how fascinating it is for me. to see parts of me in another person.
maybe we're all replicas of one another. maybe all we see is ourselves in others, and others in ourselves. parts, fragments and pieces of us... perception bah..
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)